03/ 07/ 2005
by Judy Artunian
Most of us have formed friendships with people we have met through work. But when those friends are also your customers, the work-friendship mix can become toxic.
It is tempting to take on friends as customers. You have an easy rapport with each other. They could be a source of new business referrals. But when your friend is also your customer, emotions may get the best of you when you least expect it. That can be the case even if you both enter into the business relationship with a firm vow to never let the friendship get in the way of business, and vice versa. That is because, deep down, we all expect special treatment from our friends. Your comfortable business association might run smoothly for years, when suddenly your friend/customer's business falls on hard times and he or she assumes that you will extend him or her better terms, with no questions asked. Or, you might find yourself assuming that your friend will absorb a price hike or a change in services with no complaints.
The key to maintaining a healthy business relationship with a friend is to set your boundaries early. For instance, you may decide that you won't discuss any business or personal matters with him or her that you wouldn't discuss with other customers. You might also agree that asking for special favors is off limits. The definition of a special favor could come into question down the line, so discuss the definition up front.
Even with such ground rules in place, your friend may expect a price break that you can't provide. You can decline the request without alienating the person. Rather than saying "I can't do that," and then ending the conversation, talk to him about what you can do. Even if your alternatives don't meet the person’s needs, he or she will likely walk away reassured that you tried to help him.
If you agree to his or her request for a price break, make sure he or she understands that there are limits to how deep a discount you can offer. You might also consider providing the discounted rate for a limited time only.
Like any customer relationship, the one you form with a friend can be strained by ordinary snafus like late deliveries or misunderstandings. In that case, treat your friend like any other customer by offering an apology, and, if it is your policy to do so, a refund. If your friend still isn't satisfied, remind him or her (as you would any customer) that you want to continue doing business with him or her, and that you are doing all you can to remedy the situation.
You might want to limit your social activities with customers who become friends. For instance, attending your customer's daughter's graduation party might be crossing the line, but sending his daughter a graduation gift might be appropriate. When someone who has been part of your social circle for a long time becomes a customer, delineating social boundaries is a trickier matter. You may have no choice but to attend the party, but when the two of you are back in your professional roles Monday morning, leave the party chatter behind.
What if a customer seems to be pushing for a friendship, but you want to keep the relationship strictly professional? Thank him or her for the invitation and tell him that your company policy limits the amount of socializing you can do with business associates. Offer to meet him for lunch or suggest other business-oriented alternatives.
Transitioning back and forth from supplier to friend isn't for everyone. If you sense that a particular friendship won't survive a business relationship, don't pursue it. Tell your friend that you value his or her friendship too much to risk harming it. Then help him or her find another company to do business with. After all, good friends, like good customers, are hard to find.
